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Go Back To Playing With Your Crayons

By tnash | February 9, 2010

You’re not a SEO* you’re a jumped up little marketer with no idea how to optimise anything so just shut up. You don’t need a blog to tell us all how little you know even if your post was in 50 top 10 posts of the year X. You don’t need to regurgitate the crap you read on your favourite guru site, you certainly don’t need to tweet it over and over again.

Get over yourselves we don’t give a damn about you. So you spoke at a conference woopie do. Does that make you an SEO*? No of course not. It means you brown nosed a bit more then most.

When you are part of an industry of marketers and failed web designers should we expect anything more from the average “social media driven SEO consultant” probably not yet I bet 90% of people reading this post will say that didn’t describe them. Which is strange because I’m pretty sure I just described 95% of the SEO industry**

Perhaps its time the industry stopped lying to itself and putting people on pedestals because they tweet 500 times a day or because they have come up with the next big unfounded, untestable theory. Instead who knows maybe you could, I don’t know, deal with clients and stuff? Or maybe just go and play with the pack of crayons.

*Disclaimer: unless you are in which case sorry :)
** I made those stats up

Topics: Business Bullshit | View Comments

View Comments to “Go Back To Playing With Your Crayons”

  1. theGypsy Says:
    February 9th, 2010 at 4:56 pm

    But no… seriously mate. Tell us how you REALLY feel? lol…. on second thought, scratch that.

  2. Hobo Says:
    February 9th, 2010 at 5:07 pm

    I thought this post was about me but I dont speak at conferences … rest of it might fit tho lol

  3. Rob @ Lost Dawg Says:
    February 9th, 2010 at 5:07 pm

    Don't tell me how you frickin feel, I don't have a lifetime to listen to your sorrows.

  4. safcblogger Says:
    February 9th, 2010 at 5:10 pm

    “..just go and play with a pack of crayons”

    Fantastic stuff

  5. Justin Parks Says:
    February 9th, 2010 at 6:56 pm

    “Instead who knows maybe you could, I don’t know, deal with clients and stuff? Or maybe just go and play with the pack of crayons.”

    Ain't that a fact.

  6. Samuel Lavoie Says:
    February 9th, 2010 at 10:18 pm

    Hilarious post, are we all getting tired of new marketers going the SEO/SMO way?

  7. annsmarty Says:
    February 9th, 2010 at 10:47 pm

    No, definitely not me *sigh of relief* Like Hobo, I don't speak at conferences, so I don't qualify lol

  8. a name Says:
    February 10th, 2010 at 7:45 am

    wow, that post actually was bullshit. do you, by any chance, speak at conferences?

  9. powersuit Says:
    February 10th, 2010 at 1:58 pm

    Awesome!!! I'm new to the industry and this is what I've been thinking. Thanks for the confimation that I'm not the crazy one.

  10. shanedj Says:
    February 10th, 2010 at 3:55 pm

    I was asked to appear at a social media conference. I DO NOT want to be one of them people so I said no thanks!

  11. alanbleiweiss Says:
    February 10th, 2010 at 5:10 pm

    oh noez… I tweet 500 times a day. Red flag #1. I don't speak at conferences, but I want to. Red flag #2.

    On the other side of things, I only blog about things I've personally tested at least enough to see real results, on real client sites. And even though I want to speak at conferences, my first attempt was rejected outright. Because I think it's totally disgusting to kiss someone's ass. And my tweets are usually rants against asshats and pedestal-pushers.

    So maybe there's hope for me

  12. Kev Strong Says:
    February 10th, 2010 at 7:22 pm

    Rant in it's purest form! I love it.

  13. nishan_k Says:
    February 10th, 2010 at 10:18 pm

    Hehe I needed something to make me laugh today. Nice rant!

  14. So you want to be an SEO? | Kay Dinsdale Says:
    February 18th, 2010 at 2:18 pm

    [...] a few people like that. But in case you think I’m being a bit harsh on the not-so-bright ones you haven’t seen anything yet. Tags: newbie, seo forums, [...]

  15. Chris M Says:
    February 22nd, 2010 at 11:51 pm

    “So you spoke at a conference woopie do. Does that make you an SEO? No of course not. It means you brown nosed a bit more then most.”

    So bloody true!

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