By Justin Parks | February 8, 2010
There is just so much Bullshit clinging to the sides of the SEO industry that it makes me want to scream but the real frustrating part is that the bullshit sticks and that for me is the major issue. I have people coming to me all the time asking for SEO services and “they read this book about it and it doesn’t seem so difficult” even though they have no idea where to begin (so much for the book) but because of this they think it should be 50 bucks under the table and problem solved.
People only hear three things when it comes to SEO and these are:
- Long Term Effort
Frankly that’s exactly what they DO NOT want to hear as it all adds up to “expensive“. No bullshit. Most people want faster results at super cheap prices and instead prefer to spend serious amounts of time and waste silly amounts of money looking for ways to take advantage of the bullshit SEO vendors promises of wealth, fame and fortune if they just by a book and become an instant SEO master blasta and it goes a little something like this.
“Sign up for only 25-99, reduced from 59-99!
Spread your name through our magic triangle of interlinked sites and gain exposure to hundreds of thousands of people with our amazing and highly reputable SEO system.
Analyse your site and fix all those SEO problems in seconds with one click and see your site at number one for some obscure keywords that no one ever types, but hell! At least it looks good!
Tell your friends and make them jealous so they buy this bullshit as well!”
This kind of crap is then followed up by a mangled list of crap testimonials and “certifications” from even more obscure bodies that are probably owned by the very same group or company and which they use to validate this super cool system. Talk about third party and independent opinion? Get real! Why bother, no one in their right mind would put their name against this drivel. no one real that is! So what, lets just make it up! No one checks this anyway and the promise of fast wealth is far to tempting.
Like doing a quick Google search for domain name ownership on WHOIS takes to much effort or taping in the name of the vendor and adding “are they legit” to the end wont bring back some type of opinion from another person or body who wont be afraid to tell they real story about this bullshit. Sheesh!
Heres some more bullshit to chew on with these SEO books, lets dissect this bit by bit:
“Finally, A Powerful Set Of Search Engine Optimization Tools So Easy To Use That You
Will Blow By Your Competitors, Get Higher
Search Engine Rankings, & Make More
Profits Starting Today!…”
Right. So what your telling me here is that with this book I will kick ass and destroy all the competition, even though they may have the very same book and be doing what it says as well, word for word. Lets not forget the fact that the minute its released its out of date and also lets just assume for one second that every single website on the planet is exactly the same so this inane and bollocks strategy will work as well for companies that sell footballs as one that sells multi million dollar villas.
“Master Resell Rights Included”
Oh right, that makes it ok then. Thanks for that ya douche.
“The Search Engine Game
Has Been Exoposed And Is
NOW Wide Open!
Are you tired of spending loads of money trying to get search engine traffic?”
Right, here is the killer. This is the line that gets my blood boiling every single time and it just stinks of bullshit. In fact, for every intelligent person that reads this I’m not even gonna bother explaining just how much crap is in these four lines, it should be immediately obvious.
Maybe you’re just tired of spending hundreds of hours trying to tweak and change your site just right so that you can hope to get a decent ranking.
Your crap at this. Get over it and go do something your good at.
Truthfully, have any of this paid off in the way that you pictured they would?
Chances are, they haven’t but don’t fret because there is good news!
To find out how to start getting the rankings you want and deserve, read on…”
Well… if you have spent hundreds of hours tweaking your site and you are not getting a decent ranking then maybe you should stop feckin about and go and write some decent content that people may actually want to read, or alternatively, just give up, cause at this stage you must be completely useless. In fact, think about hiring someone who knows what they are doing and stop spending your money on this rubbish and wasting your life.