By theGypsy | May 19, 2010
Dumb asses and blow hards
Wow, what a work out going through my feed reader was this evening. Time and time again, from people I know, trust or laugh at… one and all left me spinning. You see, the SEO world seemed to be going through a period of blogging akin to watching the paint chips fall from the wall on a lonely long weekend. I mean it was getting fucking painful out there. Same old shit… mixed up and regurgitated to new piles of steaming uselessness. Over and over and over….
Well holleee shit. That’s sure changed of late. The new fad in town seems to want to baffle with bullshit instead of blinding with brilliance in the end analysis sadly. There is a distinct habit of SEOs trying to talk from the deep end of the pool while standing 8ft below the surface – bubbles… and lot’s of ‘em.
A geeks perspective
Now, let’s get things straight, I’ve been a huge proponent of SEO’s learning more about how search engines work… I started imploring such deeds to begin both 2009 & 2010. Hoorah!! Let us sing the praises by brothers and sisters! The SEO world is finally growing up.
But wait… something seems amiss. There’s a lingering odor of ignorance and… that other stuff… Oh yea, BULLSHIT. I am starting to wonder why some people out there are writing about these topics when they obviously don’t quite grasp the concepts of how things work. Could it be they are simply bullshitting to gain some elusive and all to often, meaningless, credibility in the search community?
Look Ma! I gotz skilz
There is no need to name names, because well, that’s bullshit too, but if you’re writing crap about how the SEO world is changing (aka MayDay bullshit) because of some patent filed back in 2004 you might want to keep reading. If you’re writing about the future of search inclusive of social or behavioural signals, it might be time to break out the Katana. If you’re writing about your amazing ‘testing‘ and pretty graphs… feel free to add your own ending.
For starters, don’t be fooled by the SEO Magic Bullet, (seriously, read that and come back). If you were REALLY a smart fucking search geek, you would have learned by now that;
- Technology from patents is generally implemented at the time of filing (ever heard of ‘patent pending’?). Furthermore, they are certainly evolved or abandoned in that 6 year period since being filed
- The FUTURE of search is more likely found watching the academic world that it is old patents
You see, one thing you will end up doing as a patent geek is researching the authors (engineers) that worked on a given patent. This will often lead us on a path from the school days where a pattern of thinking emerges. You begin to get a feel for the people that worked on it, their evolution and potential evolution of the technology in question.
This journey ultimately teaches one that many of the technologies we see are born in the academic world, not necessarily the search patent / research world. Dumb asses… stop glossing over with 6yr old papers and writing assertive ignorance for mass consumption.
Testing??? Holy shit. This one still amazes me… but is close kin to the one above. I stopped calling the mucking about I do ‘testing‘ a while ago. It really is nothing more than ‘research‘ if you ask me. After many years of reading and writing about search engines, one thing I do know, it’s abso-fucking-lutely impossible to isolate, in a real world situation with large enough data sets, any one signal nor set of signals to be able to really get much from any ‘testing’.
If we don’t know the majority of the signals and associate weights/thresholds/dampening, then how the hell can you possibly get meaningful data? Beyond that little inconvenience, we’d also need some fairly large data sets (different markets, query types, aged sites) to be able to really glean anything beyond anecdotal evidence. If you don’t grasp that… then stop writing about your shit for brained tests, ok?
I could go on, that’s likely a post on it’s own though.
Cut the crap
One thing I’ve learned being a student of Slawksi University, is the use of the terms, ‘may be’ ‘might’ ‘it is possible’ and the like. In short, there is nothing wrong with embracing search beyond top 10 lists. It is a glorious endeavour. What is problematic is there are those among us that either really don’t ‘get it’ or are pontificating for self glorification. Either way, shut the fuck up. M’kay?
I’d venture a guess that there are few even at Google has the keys to the entire ranking machine. More likely it’s a Manhattan Project approach with isolated teams working on various parts of the special sauce. While it can be edu-taining to try and guess at the various ranking signals, unlocking it is about as likely as ranking a site from comment spam links on Matt Cutts blog alone.
And if you’re NOT one of the bloggers out there blowing smoke out yer ass? Please be careful what you read – if it is stated as gospel, with no qualifiers, it’s probably… (all together now) BULLSHIT.